I’ve reached the lovely bit in the trip. Can’t really find any words but then I’m on me own anyway and no one to listen. Too much work to talk anyway. Typing, thinking, writing, that’s better.

Need a wee though so going to do that and have a cheeky smoke too.

the thing is, I’m scared. But I don’t know what I’m scared of and I don’t know why I’m scared of whatever it is but it’s there like a presence.

and because I don”t have a safety person close person that can get or make me get that kind of grown up malarkey our of me,

I don’t give a shit.

ADHD/Depression/bi polar/althzeimers/too much weed/am I just a weirdo/is my body indestructable through all the drugs booze times or am I really poorly?

Is it all just fun and games or am I gonna do a Lemmy and pop me clogs at Chrimbo.

Are any of these body and mind aches I have worth paying attention to or is it all just normal?